Hell in a Handbasket

You ever lit a blue touchpaper and then stubbornly refused to retire? Or stood on a cliff and jumped up and down, daring the wind to fuck with you? In other words, have you ever done anything monumentally stupid, ever decided to go to Hell in a handbasket...just to see what would happen?

Today feels like that kind of day. With the Nazis going nuts, it feels like the kind of day to have a ginormous slut of an ice-cream sundae, as if to say to the universe at large "Hey you! Fuck you! Go ahead, do your worst, ya bastard, I've beaten you once, and I can beat you again, if I only raise my head and try!"

Not gonna actually do that of course, though I did have an early McDonalds breakfast today, by which I mean a proper McDonalds breakfast - a sausage and egg muffin, dammit! Then the day....erm...well then the day kinda got out of control, and I find myself vaguely shipwrecked on the other end of it, filled with a need to bike my increasingly-considerable (if the Nazis are to be believed) ass off, and a pure undiluted desire to do stupid but truly enjoyable shit.

It's days like this that leave you tempted to say "Y'know what? This was originally meant to be a one-year project, and it hasn't been right since the second year started, so maybe I should just declare it done at 5 or 5.5 stone."

But that doesn't really work, cos my objective then will not be met. I'm still at least four stone (or 56 pounds) overweight. I still qualify as obese, rather than simply overweight, and I still take some pills for my diabetes. So I have to press on, find a new rhythm...Hell, find an old rythm and bloody well stick to it, whatever the Hell works, and push on through.

Still, it feels like a Hell in a Handbasket day.
Hmm...

Wonder what we have in this house that I can eat that would be startlingly unwise...?

Oh very funny. I am not nibbling dishwashing tablets like after-dinner mints. Mmm...yoghurt? Yoghurt, fruit...lol I'm building a kind of weird construct in my head right now - crumbled weetabix, prunes, sliced bananas, yoghurt...A kind of Virgin Sundae...

Hey whaddaya want from me, my gran always said there was a Virgin who could save you from Hell, and at this point, I'm willing to give it a shot...

Mmmmmmmmcome to me, you entirely fucked-up creation, you...

Sigh...or there's the bike of course. Could just go and get on the bike, have a sweaty cold-shower to get through the moment...
Anybody got a coin I can toss. Ah, thanks...

Heads!

Bugger...
Best out of three?