We're Gonna Need A Bigger Bulldozer

When life gives you lemons, we are famously instructed, you should make lemonade.

This shows a stunning lack of imagination, if you ask me - how about a simple lemon sorbet, or even a possett? If you teach a man how to fish while you're at it, you can steal one of his catch, have lemon sole and make yourself really happy.

Likewise, I'm guessing, when life hands you plateaus (and it should be stressed here that one week of no weightloss does not of course make a plateau...maybe a plate, at best), you are supposed to make...what? Zen faces of acceptance? Plans? Resolutions to do better?

Yeah, all very nice and hippy, but the thing is...every now and then, I think you have to take a leaf out of the Ty Pennington school of activism.

For those who don't know Ty Pennington, he's the shouty, bullhorned, nuclear-bomb-in-human-form presenter of American sentiment-fest Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. That's a show where every week a family who've had a very human bad time tell their story with soft backing music, then Ty packs them off on holiday, demolishes their house, and builds them a new one within seven days.

When Ty Pennington has a problem - namely a crappy, insufficient old house - he doesn't smile a wan smile, swallow and accept it. He gets a bulldozer and pushes that problem the Hell out of the way till it falls down. I suspect if you gave Ty a plateau, he'd call in a JCB and before you knew what the little jackrabbit was upto, you'd have a big, big hole in the ground.

That's how I feel today - wanna grab myself a JCB or a bulldozer and push buttons till something falls down. It's pretty much all I can do to stay above the desk to type this to you, when what I really want to do is lay on the floor and practice sit-ups.

Maybe I can get some biking done tonight, but 'the routine' reported missing last night is still pretty much AWOL - will be on a train tomorrow night, though the weekend should include plenty of exercise - am heading home to Wales to move furniture again. Hmm...of course, there are also some nice hilly bits of walking that could be done in the Valleys...I'd love to see a plateau try and establish itself in the South Wales Valleys - it'd slide all the way down the hill in to the river...Mmm...good mood thoughts.

Oh and for my fellow vampires - sticking with the three-pill routine, I reckon - blood yesterday was 5.4, today, on a soggy, no-walking day, 4.2.

Wonder where I could get a bulldozer at this time of day...