Thursday, 4 December 2014

The Chemical Water Cannon

Something occurred to me - it was at about this point in the first Disappearing that Xenical, or Orlistat first made an appearance in my life. While having done the first stone and a half of weightloss (21 lbs) off my own bat, when the help of drugs was offered to me, I wasn't stupid enough to turn it down.

Went to the doctors today, just to introduce myself, talk heart issues, talk cholesterol, talk deafness, and of course talk weight. Told him about the losing six stone, putting four and a half of it back on thing, and his eyes widened. I mentioned the Xenical, and he said "Oh as long as you're under diabetic control - and you are - I've no problem putting you back on that."

So as of tomorrow, welcome back to my world the explosive orange shite bomb that is Xenical - basically it's a chemical truncheon or water cannon, to punish stupid-ass behaviour by shooting a percentage of the fat you take in right out of your ass without annnnny damn say on your part, in a ghastly orange flume.

Yay.

The idea being of course that the way you avoid this is to not take in the excess fat in the first damn place - so like a Pavlovian punching bag, you either learn to moderate your behaviour, or life gets messy and socially awkward.

Welcome back to life with the extremely scared Disappearing Man. Welcome back to the Orange Flume of Disgust. Welcome back to the chemical water cannon.

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