Goodbyeee…

Right – that’s it, that’s your lot, so long, farewell, toodle pip and all that, we’re outta here…for a few days.

After this entry, I can’t guarantee I’ll have web access at any point over the next week, so your daily drip-feed of the minutiae of my Disappearing life will be significantly interrupted. As I’ve said before, I’ll still be writing daily entries, but you’ll get ’em as and when I can wave my dongle at the sky and get someone to notice.

Now, even though I haven’t got the champagne-bubble feeling just yet (I’m sitting on a train, preeeetty much wanting to kill pretty much everyone else in my carriage – as appears to be mandatory these days, as train companies appear to be working overtime to meet their bastard-quota), my appetite clearly knows it’s on vacation at this point – had oatmeal and grapes for breakfast, a chickeny McDonalds burger for lunch, and right now I’m having explicit, gooey, cheesy fantasies about an enoooooormous plate of pasta with strawberries and cream to follow…I’m not hungry by any stretch of the imagination, I just want stufffffff!

And indeed, now I think about it, stuffing. Mmmm…crannnnberrries.

Hell, if I’m gonna sound like him, I might as well infringe copyright and say:

Coooooooooooooooooookiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeee!!!!!!

Nomnomnomnomnomnom….

OK, someone throw a bucket of water over me, cos this is getting silly now.

Oh…wait. Cookies…..make that a bucket of cold, gold-topped, full-fat-and-then-some, artery-clogging creamy yummy milk…

And a straw, please.

(Sounds of sad, empty lip-smacks, and the occasional boot-thwack as I kick the bejeesus out of the tedious fuck in the seat opposite me – who just, as a precursor to a bathroom visit, announced “I know where my penis is, I don’t need my glasses for that” to his wife…and indeed the rest of us who really, truly, couldn’t give a fuck, even WITH his penis)…

Well…fine…this is me, going blog cold-turkey….

Mmmm…turrrkey…

Fuck, and we’re back to the cranberries. Somebody stop me!

Going away now. No, really.

Truly…

Bye…

(Oh – blood was 4.7 today. Right, bye!)