The Lurgi Retalliation

Unff.

OK fine...so Disappearing trousers be damned. Ring me the goddamned bells, people!
"Man-Fluuuuu! Man-Fluuuuu!"
Painted a couple of black crosses on the front door this morning. That was about all I managed to achieve today. Well, two black crosses, one press release and a partridge in a pair treeeee...

Head one enormous bubble of sickly green snot, that - and here's the part I really don't understand - burns when you swallow it. What the Hell is that about? Tequila-snot? Nowhere near as much fun as it sounds.

Thought of getting on the bike right now is enough to make me fall to my knees and weep. But then oddly enough, thought of simply sitting here, or laying down, or blinking, is pretty much enough to make me fall to my knees and weep too.

Well, it would be, if the thought of falling to my knees didn't make me want to weep...

The phrase "good for nothing" is thrown about carelessly these days. But today, that would be me. Good for absoluuuutely buggerall. Might just conceivably achieve some heavy snoring later on, but other than that, this is one of those days which, on my eventual (we hope!) death-bed, I'll really resent the fuck out of. When it comes time to expire, and all the might-have-been days of long walks on the beach, and good wine with friends, and making sweet love with my girl flash in front of my eyes...hopefully lingering here and there...days like today will rise up like cancerous black carbuncles on my sweaty ass, cos they're days that could have been spent doing so much more, or so much else, than sitting here whimpering, blowing rivers of snot out of every conceivable orifice (don't ask) and feeling supremely, Man-Fluishly, sorry for myself.

Hating this more than just a little...