The Better Stories Conclusion

Went to reclaim my hat this morning. At first, it couldn't be found. I'm almost ashamed to say that having been told that the hat wasn't in the Catholic church where I accidentally left it on Christmas Day, I was all geared up for a good old rant about the Catholic church having big hats of their own, without needing to steal them off poor unsuspecting atheists.

Needless to say, when I went back in to double check, a nice man in a green T-shirt approached me in my sad hatlessness and said "Did you lose a hat?"
Turned out it had been put away for me in a special place, after I'd dropped the priest an email to say "Yo dude - lost my hat!"

So...fiiiiine...can't bitch about the Catholic church or make jokes about their hats today. (Shrugs) Two days from now is another year...

Went from there to do a thing I've been meaning to do for some weeks now.
Bought myself a new computer.

To be strictly accurate, bought our business a new computer. Bottom line, I've had my laptop about five years or so now, and while it's still working fine after its total brain meltdown earlier this year, I was advised by my optician that if I'm gonna do the amount of hours staring at a screen that being an editor by both day job and side business requires me to do, I should really go up to something with a big-ass screen.

To be fair, I have something with a big-ass screen in my day-job office in London. Thing is, it also has the brain of a Mac, and is therefore by inclination a godrotted, cryptic piece of shit designed specifically to increase the misery quotient of human beings. So today, I invested what I think qualifies as "a shitload" of the business's money in a new computer with a 23 inch touchscreen.

The thing is - it wasn't really the hardware that nearly made me declare the company bankrupt. It was all the stuff that needs to come with it - an upgraded operating system, for one. A new Norton program and something that I've only heard about before called "cloud backup" for another. And a business-licensed version of Word for a third, and the kicker. That last mofo cost about £200! On it's pigging own!

For those who like a laugh, I didn't even get to take it out of the store today. I was gonna, but then they dangled the "have it installed by someone who's not a brain-dead moron" service in my face, and I shelled out another £30. I'm picking it up New Year's Day. by which time, if all goes well, I'll a) have tidied a pathway to ground zero on my desk, and b) have finished the edit I'm currently doing, and so will have at least a day or two of annual leave time in which to focus on the day job, and on exploring the ass off the new little office-jewel.

My pal Rebecca came round tonight for a while. We exchanged Christmas gifts - hers to us was a tin of simply gorgeous chocolate chip Welsh Cakes. I have about 48 hours of the Inbetweeny Zone in which to enjoy them before the launch of the new year regime. We gave her a supposedly lifesize cardboard Daniel Craig. She loved it, and went away to make the most of him.

I'd no sooner changed into my onesie - oh yes...I own a onesie now; a slightly bizarre, but hey-I'm-not-proud Christmas gift from Ma, to spend the rest of the evening editing and chilling, than my other pal Lee texted.
"Wanna catch a movie?" he asked.
"What's on?"
"Life of Pi...In 3d. In about 25 minutes," he expounded.
"Suuuure," I said. d and I both went.
How to describe it...

Erm...

Possibly as the most beautiful waste of time I've seen this year. Which, from a Man who sat through John Carter is saying something. Ang Lee delivers stunning visuals, and goddammit, I know there was A Point in the movie somewhere.

My pants would be on fire right now if I told you I had the first idea what it was. Possibly, if I had to take a stab at it, that believing in God makes for better stories.

(Sigh). NEXT!

The movie we're both looking forward to most at the moment is Quartet. Go Google it now, it looks to be fun and fabulous.
And so, 2012 draws to a close. A year of gains and losses, and it's tempting to see all of them as negatives. Sure - gained a couple of net stone back on the year. Lost my dad. Those are the headlines.
On the other hand, gained a new home, a new acceptance of my town, a new business (which still struggles to quantify itself as anything other than an expensive new way of losing money), a new bank, for which I can only be grateful, a new way of working, ditto, and a new insight into this whole business of Disappearing, beyond the rigidity of my perspex walls. Here's to telling new and better stories - and hopefully one old one in a new way - as we Disappear into 2013.